I would like to thank Belle Lagon for her comment on my last post.
Where do you live Belle? It sounds like the men where you live are a lot like Frenchmen. In other words, they expect sex on a first date, and they don’t understand if you want to wait. It makes it so difficult for me as I’m not from that culture. And even if I was, I’m not sure I would fit the mould…
Straight to friendzone by the 2nd date if you haven’t had sex? Wow. That’s brutal. Personally, I think that even if a guy finds a woman sexually compatible, that doesn’t mean that he necessarily wants to date her. It means he wants to have sex with her.
And as you say, some men think putting out on the 1st date is slutty. So basically we can’t win!
The other day, I had a conversation with a man who explained that maybe there was a different way of seeing ‘slutty’ and that was ‘uninhibited’. He said why have all these pre-conceived ideas about when to have sex, why not have sex on the first date. And this guy is English. So really, men will be men. If they can get sex on a 1st date, they’re hardly going to say ‘no’. If they can persuade you to have sex on a 1st date, they will. What that means for your image, how they perceive you in a long-term girlfriend material kind of way, is a different matter… And let’s not forget how we perceive ourselves…
I still think that if a guy really wants to get to know a woman, he will date her and wait for sex. I’m not saying months, just a few weeks, until the time is right. And if he doesn’t want to wait? Well, I guess he’s just not that interested. And… next!
Thanks again Belle for your comment. More comments are most welcome!