Two posts in one day! I’m off to the UK tonight for a few days so I thought I’d write this post to keep you guys occupied during my absence. Feel free to drop me a comment with your own suggestions. And remember, to all my new readers, please sign off with a name so I know who you are!
So, Frenchmen don’t like needy women. I don’t think any man likes a needy woman. But I think Frenchmen especially.
Why? Because he’s got his own stuff to do that doesn’t involve you. Like going to the gym, hanging out with his friends, playing squash, ironing his shirts, getting his car serviced, helping his brother buy a new computer, that kind of thing.
This stuff is his life. Think he’ll slow down on this stuff to make more time for you? Think again. He will squeeze you in when and where he has time. Or push his stuff around to accommodate you. He won’t stop doing his stuff for you or cancel any of his stuff to see you instead.
What this means is that you have a hell of a lot of free time on your hands. But what, have you stopped seeing your friends, going to the gym and watching marathon episodes of your favourite TV show because you’re in lurve? Well, you need to get back to your old rhythm and fast. Maybe you guys lived on top of each other for the first few months, but at some point your Frenchman started going back to his old way of life, but with you now in it too. While you maybe kept going full speed ahead.
Now you can continue to sit around and wait for your man to show up. Or, you can start doing some of your own stuff too. It might be frustrating at first because you just don’t get why your man doesn’t want to spend more time with you. But it is what it is. Men are not women. They need other outlets. So until you actually live together, you’ll see him when he can.
This may drive you crazy. It may make you think, why should my life revolve around him? Why should I just drop everything when he’s free? I haven’t seen him in 4 days and he doesn’t even seem to care!
Believe me, I’ve been there. You can put your point forward if you feel you’re always making room for his last-minute plans with you. You can even say you’re not free when he does call you so he sees how it feels to come after your other stuff. But in the end, these are just games. Your man will not change, so it’s a case of just putting up with it. Within reason of course.
Anyway, balance is good! It’s important to go for a drink with the girls, to have some quiet time doing a facial and painting your nails.
If you need something more, why not start taking salsa classes, or do a course in something to further your education? There’s always something you can do to take your mind off things.
Because if your mind is anything like mine, if left unoccupied it spirals out of control. And then you will become the NEEDY NAG:
– Honey, we never see each other, why?
– I need to see you, why don’t you need to see me?
– Don’t you love me?
– Can we see each other all this week?
– Can’t you cancel going to the gym?
Don’t go there. Preserve your dignity and find something else to do. And if you find your guy is barely finding anytime for you at all, dump his ass.